The Seven Biggest Lies Among Gringos in Costa Rica

Costa Ricans have a great sense of humor. When you retire here and learn Spanish you will learn to appreciate how funny the Costa Ricans can be. It seems they are always joking about something. They say that everything here is a vacilón (fun).

Here is an example of Costa Rican humor.

The ticos (Costa Ricans) say that the three most important things in a Costa Rican man’s life are: Beer, women and soccer. Not necessarily in that order.

They also say that the three biggest lies in Costa Rica are:
(1) This is last drink of the night or zarpe (as it is called here).
(2) I’ll pay you the money I owe you tomorrow.
(3) I won’t penetrate you when we have sex.

Here are the most common lies you hear from Gringos who have moved here. If you have resided here for any period of time I am sure you have heard most of them from your fellow countrymen.

(1) I speak fluent Spanish (In reality it takes years to speak the language well)
(2) I have the best lawyer with the best contacts in Costa Rica (every American brags about this to feel important)
(3) I am an expert in real estate (I have heard this one 1000 times)
(4) I am an expert on Costa Rica retirement (This one is getting really old)
(5) It was her first night in the brothel (I must have heard this hundreds of times from naïve males)
(6) I was  a Navy Seal in Vietnam  and war hero ( Believe or not I have heard different versions of this)
(7) I didn’t lose any money with the Brothers (a popular investment with foreigners that went belly-up a few years ago. Most people won’t admit they invested there or they say that they got all of their principal back because they didn’t let their money ride.)

Surely I will add to this list in the not too distant future.

2 comments so far

  1. cassie
    #1

    so true about the brothers haha

  2. Ed Martin
    #2

    Wanted to call you for some questions but could not find a phone # anywhere on the site-Call me at 305-551-6926

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